We’re recording a charity Christmas song and I’m drowning in a sea of wrong notes. Luckily, a lifeboat is at hand
I am in a lifeboat station on the south coast, standing beneath the stern of a Shannon class rescue vessel, wearing a borrowed fisherman’s jumper and holding a banjo. There are lights on me, and I am very much at sea.
My band has recorded a Christmas song to celebrate the 200th anniversary of the Royal National Lifeboat Institution, and we are here to make the music video. As usual, the shoot consists of a group of young people ordering a group of old people to do mildly humiliating things while filming them, like a care home scandal drama set to music.